Subtraction Changes Me
Pain Was
Also The Mind’s Illness
For the past several years, my life was a series of seemingly repeating bad events. My physical health was gradually deteriorating. My body was literally ‘the illness center’. I was depressed, and suffered from insomnia and neurogenic gastroenteritis. I had especially severe menstrual pain. I suffered from the pain a week before the period started and few days after it started. I could barely walk. Although I had it once a month, it knocked me out, as the pain lasted for ten days.
Even though I tried many different treatments including prescription medications, Oriental medicine, and medicinal herbs, I never found relief. I tried pain relievers, which had rather worsened my stomach.
Because of pain and my weakened physical condition, I ended up quitting my job.
I also lost my confidence as I was uncertain about what I could do with this body. My mother resignedly told me that it was the family history and I had no choice but to endure it for the rest of my life.
The winter before last, my good friend came to me with a rather bright face. She said that she had been thinking about me while she was doing Maum Meditation. Her consolation, “the tough life is not yours”, touched me and I started the meditation right away.
I had many grim memories: feeling unwelcomed and unaccepted by those around me; stories of familial jealousy and resentment; suffering the injustice of sexual discrimination; the weight and pressure of being the eldest child. All of my past resulted in a mind that wanted to run away from everything.
Through Maum Meditation I threw out this mind completely. I threw out the images of my mom, my brother and the longing for love from my mom. As a week passed, I actually felt that the mind was gone. All those sufferings have disappeared! I was truly grateful that there was really a method to become free.
About a month later, I started to throw away my mind’s images of my body and, surprisingly, the menstrual pain also started to lessen. Because the mind influences the body, as I cleansed my mind, my body healed. This was possible because the fundamental problems from mind were solved.
I truly understood the meaning of, ‘the root cause of all illnesses is the mind’.
I have now completed the whole meditation course. The menstrual pain has disappeared and I no longer experience depression or insomnia. As a result of Maum Meditation, I am living and working without the stresses, pains, and burdens that had plagued my body. I am able to live life without fears and frustrations. I am certain and confident that ‘my body no longer influences my future days’.
If you keep growing your mind illness while being doubtful about whether that could really be thrown away, I want to say this to you: ‘That mind is all false so if you just throw it away, you will surely regain the healthy mind and body.’
Written by Hye-Eun Seo (31), Directing manager
